Star Wars Marvel Comics: Leia Grounds Luke From Adventure

Behold the latest offering from the dying Marvel comics, Star Wars #9, written by Charles Soule:

 

 

Wow! Luke, Leia, and Lando on an adventure together? Really? That’s awesome!

 

So how come Leia is the only one on the cover?

 

 

Well let’s not quibble. Let’s dive into this pile of manure. Can’t wait to see what Luke does on this big heist!

 

 

Oh…

 

Well it’s probably a good thing that Big Sis was there to make sure Luke doesn’t shoot his eye out, or something. Or maybe Luke is just too white and male for adventures these days.

 

Cue the Diversity Squad!

 

 

I’m sure the angsty teenager with fluorescent blue hair will have no problem finding the path.

 

But hey, at least Luke is smart enough to keep quiet when wahmen are talking.

 

 

Sorry Lando. You may be a PoC, but you have no vagina, and you’re way too old.

 

 

Originally published here.

Itchy Bacca

Father of the Wookiee named Chewbacca, who lives with my wife in the city of Rwookrrorro on the planet Kashyyyk. Just a very old Star Wars fan since the very beginning. Check out my blog at: disneystarwarsisdumb. wordpress.com

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